Posted by: Vicky | February 5, 2011

Wherein my clothes try to sabotage my running

I realised yesterday that the Bristol 10k is no more than three months away now. Which means, if I want to achieve item #1 on my 2011 todo list I have to start training for it pronto! After all, I want to increase my top sustainable speed from just over 8 km per hour to 10 km per hour or faster!

So, since this morning I failed to get out of bed and go to what would have been my second spinning class of the year*, I made myself go out for a run in the afternoon.

My first proper (i.e. non-treadmill) run of 2011 did not get off to a good start.

The moment I started running my running shorts started trying to escape. Apparently, just because they seem to fit perfectly when standing, sitting or walking, that doesn’t mean a size 16 runner can get away with wearing size 14 running shorts. They will keep up a concerted effort to show the world your underwear.

But my underwear wasn’t having any of that! If it had just been the shorts, I’d have carried on and just run a shorter route than planned (no pun intended). However, within a minute of starting to run I felt bunched up material around my thighs. I tried to smooth out the shorts, but they were already lying flat against my legs (after all, they were a size small). Confused, I tried to work out what it could possibly be. I didn’t think I was wearing anything other than the shorts near my thighs.

Eventually I worked out that it was MY PANTS!!!

I still can’t believe they made it all the way down there on both sides!!!

Evil pants!!!

Sorry about all the exclamation marks, but I’m still extremely horrified at the memory. I was convinced everyone who saw me could tell that my pants were making for my knees. And there’s NO WAY to pull your pants up without really drawing people’s attention to the problem!

That was why in spite of the embarrassment of having to walk (there was no way I was running any more, if the shorts had managed to escape, I would have been MOONING PEOPLE!!!) back past the same people I’d just jogged past a minute ago, I turned back.

It was my own special walk of shame. The my-pants-are-halfway-to-my-knees-and-my-shorts-are-trying-to-follow-them-and-I’m-wearing-a-very-short-top kind of walk of shame.

Thank goodness I hadn’t got very far yet!

This experience of evil, sabotaging clothes has taught me three things:

  1. If you try to wear running shorts that are labelled as being a size smaller than you know you are, you will regret it, regardless of how well they seem to fit when just walking.
  2. Cotton pants are the best kind for doing sports in (I knew this already, but now I’m never going to forget it again).
  3. Having the hill climb at the end of your run is totally worth not having to pass the same people waiting at the bus stop for the third time in less than ten minutes.

All in all I’m very proud of myself for managing to make myself leave the house to go for a run twice in the space of ten minutes. Especially since the first attempt felt so very embarrassing! Well done me! ;)

* I truly dislike spinning. But I like getting fitter. So I will keep attempting to make it to class. (And paying the £3 fine when I don’t. Frugal February FAIL)



  1. Hilarious, and I thought I was the only one this sort of thing happens to! Perhaps your knickers are too big after all that dieting?

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